Curse of African witch doctor lifted from England squad by Cornish druid
England need all the help they can get to beat Slovenia today and advance to the second round of the World Cup.
So Fabio Capello's side will presumably be happy to hear that the curse that is the real reason for their struggles so far has been lifted.
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Ed Prynn, the Archdruid of Cornwall, says he has lifted the magical burden that was placed on the team in Cape Town — by an African witch doctor.
The 73-year-old mystic, from Padstow, said that the likes of Wayne Rooney and Frank Lampard, who have so far performed poorly at the tournament, will now be free to wreak havoc on opposition defences.
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"I have lifted the curse put on the England team by a witch doctor in Africa," he said.
"They will feel like a big black cloud has passed over and it will be a new beginning. People will probably think I've lost my marbles but when the bird landed on the goal during the Algeria game on Friday, it was like a red light telling me the team were in trouble. They were doomed.
"I felt it was my time to help England so I went to a stone hexagon with a hole in the middle and took the curse with me mentally from the east as I passed through the stone to face the west.
"I said to all the angels, mother nature and spirits that are connected with the beyond to help lift the curse off the England team for the rest of the time they in Africa.
"I will know if my spell has worked straight away on Wednesday and England will win – even if it's a penalty shoot- out."
While England fans will no doubt thank the archdruid for helping at our hour of need, he may get a red card from Cornish nationalists, who have campaigned this summer for supermarkets in Cornwall to stop selling "foreign" St George's Crosses for people to display publicly.
Comments
by Roy, Redruth
Saturday, June 26 2010, 7:42AM
“What a nutter.”
by Big Ger, Truro
Thursday, June 24 2010, 11:05AM
“It looks like his wishes have been answered, good on him.
It's far better to hear his (slightly barmy) good will towards our national squad, than the parochial miserable bad mouthing that the nationalists give them.”
by P. Lemon, Penryn
Wednesday, June 23 2010, 6:00PM
“Big Geraldine = fruit loop
No it didn't (lol)
www duchyofcornwall eu
KBV”
by Matt, Redruth
Wednesday, June 23 2010, 12:03PM
“Please don't encourage these sort of people.
Anyone can claim to remove something that didn't exist in the first place then take all the credit for it if it "works".
At least he's not charging for doing it...”
by Big Ger, Truro
Wednesday, June 23 2010, 11:30AM
“It didn't take long for the fruit loops to come out to play, did it?”
by Big Ger, Truro
Wednesday, June 23 2010, 11:28AM
“It didn't take long for the fruit loops to come out to play, did it?”
by son of Iolo Morgannwg, ENYS MON /ANGLESEY
Wednesday, June 23 2010, 11:24AM
“I see the fake Arch-druid of CERNYW ED PRYNN is supporting the Lloegr football team shame on you.We on Enys Mon know the Saesneg well and the Dryw of Mon hold our own curse over the england football team for their behaviour in britain and cornwall being anti-cornish and anti-british”
by Big Ger, Truro
Wednesday, June 23 2010, 9:39AM
“Nice to see that this man, however peculiar his beliefs, has not let the Nationalists cow him into being unsporting about our national side.
Good on him for offering his support to the English squad.
A few more like this chap, and the ¿Fishermans Friends¿ as ambassadors of Cornishness, and a few less like Lemon and Chapell and the nationalists may even gain some support!”