ROYAL Cornwall Hospital's chaplain is praising a Truro family for its brave campaign to help parents who have suffered the tragedy of losing an unborn child.

Head of children's and women's services, Chaplain Sue Golden, is backing the Ella's Memory campaign which was launched by Martyn and Emmillie Selley, whose baby was stillborn in December.

The couple, from Carnon Downs, want to overhaul the Daisy Suite, a special room used by parents going through the trauma of losing their baby.

"Many people are affected by the loss of a baby, but it is an experience that can be very isolating," said Sue.

"As a parent you never expect to bury your child. I think it is recognising that regardless of how long a mother has been carrying her baby when there is a loss, they also lose their hopes and dreams and know that it will never be.

"Many women also feel a sense of guilt, and fathers can also have mixed emotions as they try to be strong for their wife or partner."

The loss can also be acutely felt by couples who have undergone IVF treatment, she said, and their loss can be very difficult to cope with.

The chaplain has been holding services and blessings at the Royal Cornwall Hospital's tiny chapel for six years. In the corner of the room sits a book of remembrance containing a poignant list of names. Parents are invited to write the child's name on a pebble which is then placed in a fountain in the memorial garden as a way of marking the passing of each baby lost. "You can never say that time is a great healer – losing a child is something you never get over, but you can learn to deal with the loss," she said. One important step is to bond with the baby and allow parents to say their goodbyes. One thing that parents often regret is not holding their child before the funeral service. People often bottle their emotions trying to be strong and are afraid to show their grief, especially when there are young children in the family. In order to grieve you need to let go of the baby and hold onto the memories," she said.