Beating the credit crunch
It's up there with Wagner's Ring Cycle and Bowie's Life On Mars as one of the musical greats.
I have to say that the crass ditty has entered my consciousness more than Pizza Hut's food has entered my stomach.
I'm not a fan of fast food and now as a father of three girls under six I'm very wary about introducing them to the world of burgers, greasy fries and plastic paraphernalia.
But finding ourselves at a loose end and hampered about where to go thanks to the recent endless rain we decided to give the Pizza Hut at Maiden Green, Truro, a go.
The fact that it boasts a salad bar has got to be a good thing, hasn't it..?
Reviewing a fast food chain might prove pointless – we all know what to expect; the golden arches et al are branded on our national psyche unfortunately.
But I have to say that during these times where we're all feeling the pinch, Pizza Hut is brilliant value for money. And it's relatively healthy.
When Amelie, Evie and Robyn discovered there was an "ice cream factory" at Pizza Hut there was no changing our destination such was their excitement.
We waited a long time to be seated but only because a member of staff was giving our table a very thorough clean – I'd much rather stand around than have someone else's clammy garlic bread squished on my bottom.
We were served by a very pleasant young man who was great with the kids, bringing them crayons and activity books and was keen to see to our every need.
The buffet lunch seemed too good an option to miss – for £5.99 for adults and £3.49 for children you can basically fill your plate as high as you want.
Perhaps not politically correct in these times of growing obesity, but it does mean that, like us, you can ensure that alongside the pizza slices you will fill the kiddies' plates with goodness from the salad bar.
Because of the "fun" element of helping themselves the little darlings forget that what they're loading up is the green stuff they'd have a tantrum about at home.
The pizzas are good – crunchy bases, excellent toppings and with a whole rang of flavours to choose from.
The ice cream factory was next and being an overgrown kid I went for the adult option (£2.49) while the girls had a great time topping their ice cream with Smarties, marshmallows and chocolate sauce.
At only £2 this is a real bargain for a children's dessert especially as you can refill your bowl as many times as you want.
Though, unless you're a real-life Mr Creosote from Monty Python, you won't get past two bowls – my kids only did one.
Throw in some cheesy garlic bread, an adult portion of profiteroles and a round of drinks and the grand total for five was a very reasonable £32.
During the credit crunch I would heartily recommend a family visit to crunch on Pizza Hut's goodies.
